TOLEDO, Ohio — UPDATE: Charges of aggravated menacing and criminal damaging against Tomy Diaz were dropped Dec. 14, 2024. He is no longer facing any criminal charges.
A south Toledo man accused of threatening to kill his ex-girlfriend saw a judge on Monday.
Tomy Diaz is charged with aggravated menacing involving his former girlfriend of nine years, Kayla Rivera.
Rivera said she has experienced domestic violence and she's desperate to save herself and her children.
"Women die all the time in cases like this, kids as well," Rivera said. "I don't want to be one of those women and I don't want my kids to be one of those kids."
She said her nine-year relationship came to an end eight months ago but with the cost of living on the rise, separating from a consistent source of income was challenging.
So she allowed her ex-boyfriend to help, but she said the red flags got worse and they were too alarming to ignore.
"Harassment, abuse, assaults, stalking. He's run me off the road, he's threatened to kill me and my kids," Rivera said. "So, there's an active CPO, I have an active civil protection order against him and my kids and he's in jail currently."
Deidra Lashley, a domestic violence advocate and the executive director of the Bethany House shelter, said Rivera's actions are a typical response in a financial abuse situation.
"It takes a process of making a plan, maybe leaving and seeing how you do on your own. Then going back, leaving and going back, and finding resources and then going back," Lashley said. "A lot of times there's a process before leaving for good and some of that is looking at what is available and what recourses are there."
Lashley said there are resources available and she encourages victims to reach out.
"There is a way out," Lashley said. "It's not easy and it's dangerous, but there are people that will support them and there are really good programs that we have in our community to help."
Rivera said she hopes her actions inspire the next person to beware of the red flags.
"You just never know with people when it comes to breakups and things like that," Rivera said. "You just never know what they will do to try to get back at you."
If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence, you can contact the YWCA 24-hour crisis line at 419-241-7386, the Bethany House at 419-727-4948, or the Toledo Police Domestic Violence Unit at 419-936-3832.
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